I'm coming to terms with the fact that things don’t always happen in life as we plan it, more than a month after the declaration of the mains result.
I was indeed better prepared to deal with the negative results this time around when compared to my earlier attempt, but it still hurts a great deal.
An immediate reassuring reasoning that helped me was that it could have been worse if I had gone to the interview stage and not made it in the final list. Last year, the final results of the civil services were out just a day before the prelims of this year were scheduled.
I can’t even imagine what would have gone through the minds of all those who attended last year’s interview and did not find a place in the final list
One of the most comforting and soothing mails I received was quoting the Bhagvat Gita saying that everything happens for a good cause and that when a door closes another one opens.
Just three days later the final results of a major public sector bank was out and it lessened the pain. But it still is only a very small consolation.
Showing posts with label reflections. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reflections. Show all posts
Friday, April 10, 2009
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
The Signature Scare
The email signature of a well meaning friend in Bombay read thus:
'Plan a career within a life; not a life within a career'
It hit me like a billion pound sledgehammer. And I was forced into deep introspection.
It has certainly taken longer than I had imagined, for the Civil Services dream to fructify.
Have my friends and classmates stolen a march over me in life?
Is my friend pointing this out to me rather politely??
What are the alternatives that I could have pursued?
A corporate career that involves spending at least 12 hours in office, another 3 hours stuck in the traffic, an unhappy and whining wife who complains about lack of time spent together, non-existent social life, perpetual overworked state, constant anxiety about job-loss and promotions?
For a couple of days I was a little disoriented...
But then I recouped...
In the last several months that I have been jobless and preparing for the exams how much lead have my class mates stolen over me?
A lot of them have got married.
Being single is a happy situation, that doesn’t really bother me at all
A few have become dads/moms.
Again...not something I’m really envious of
Most have booked a flat and bought a car.
And when I realise that these very acts in some ways have tied them down financially with hefty loans and daunting EMIs; I feel a lot better with just my rented place and Bajaj Discover.
A career in the civil services is far superior to anything else on offer in India.
In the long run, I reckon I’m going to be better off with a satisfying career and the fringe benefits that will accrue
An ASSOCHAM Survey findings of July 2007 is very re-assuring
In the survey titled ‘Have Civil Services Lost their Charm with Advancement in Liberalisation’, 80 per cent of the 300 young executives from the corporate sector said that the IAS, IFS, and IPS drew the best talent contrary to impressions that flight of talent had shifted towards private sector with advancing liberalisation.
The assertion that civil services is losing its sheen is totally out of place and disparaging as every aspirant cannot withstand the rigours of the layers of civil service examination, said ASSOCHAM president, Venugopal N. Dhoot.
No, it’s not as bad as my friend’s signature line makes it out to be.
Even if it takes a few extra months, it’s still very much worth it.
'Plan a career within a life; not a life within a career'
It hit me like a billion pound sledgehammer. And I was forced into deep introspection.
It has certainly taken longer than I had imagined, for the Civil Services dream to fructify.
Have my friends and classmates stolen a march over me in life?
Is my friend pointing this out to me rather politely??
What are the alternatives that I could have pursued?
A corporate career that involves spending at least 12 hours in office, another 3 hours stuck in the traffic, an unhappy and whining wife who complains about lack of time spent together, non-existent social life, perpetual overworked state, constant anxiety about job-loss and promotions?
For a couple of days I was a little disoriented...
But then I recouped...
In the last several months that I have been jobless and preparing for the exams how much lead have my class mates stolen over me?
A lot of them have got married.
Being single is a happy situation, that doesn’t really bother me at all
A few have become dads/moms.
Again...not something I’m really envious of
Most have booked a flat and bought a car.
And when I realise that these very acts in some ways have tied them down financially with hefty loans and daunting EMIs; I feel a lot better with just my rented place and Bajaj Discover.
A career in the civil services is far superior to anything else on offer in India.
In the long run, I reckon I’m going to be better off with a satisfying career and the fringe benefits that will accrue
An ASSOCHAM Survey findings of July 2007 is very re-assuring
In the survey titled ‘Have Civil Services Lost their Charm with Advancement in Liberalisation’, 80 per cent of the 300 young executives from the corporate sector said that the IAS, IFS, and IPS drew the best talent contrary to impressions that flight of talent had shifted towards private sector with advancing liberalisation.
The assertion that civil services is losing its sheen is totally out of place and disparaging as every aspirant cannot withstand the rigours of the layers of civil service examination, said ASSOCHAM president, Venugopal N. Dhoot.
No, it’s not as bad as my friend’s signature line makes it out to be.
Even if it takes a few extra months, it’s still very much worth it.
Monday, December 29, 2008
Hyderabad Diaries
I’ve never needed any convincing on the advantages of e-ticketing for rail travel. The only reason that I hadn’t traveled using an e-ticket was that I did not have a printer handy at home, which meant an added effort of going to a net-cafe for the print out of the ticket.
But then in the current instance, I get invited to Hyderabad and I’m required to travel at very short notice, which meant absolutely no time was to be lost in making a decision.
A quick check on the railways site indicated the possibility of an RAC ticket. This also meant that it could soon become a Waiting List ticket if I did not act promptly.There was a serious risk that the time lost in reaching the railway station and joining the serpentine queue could almost deny me a chance to travel.
This is the context in which I sign up once again on the IRCTC website. My previous sign up had become invalid because my very valuable yahoo email-id had long been lost to phishers :(
It just felt so very nice, to get a ticket like that, clicking away at a few links, not needing to step out of home queuing up and sweating it out. And soon I was out getting a print of the ticket and there, I’m all ready to head to Hyderabad.
They have now introduced a Side Middle Berth between the traditional Side Upper Berth and the Side Lower Berths which neatly adds nine extra berths to a sleeper coach up from seventy two earlier to eighty one now. An ingenuous use of space for capacity utilisation!! I was much impressed.
On paper, both Hyderabad and Bangalore are comparable cities. Both are rapidly growing Indian metropolises, IT capitals, state capitals and south Indian cities with comparable size of populations. The similarity ends right there...
Bangalore is infinitely more cosmopolitan and in a sense more elitist. Hyderabad perfectly fits the description of a large overgrown Indian village. Unruly traffic, bad roads, people relieving themselves on the road in unacceptably large numbers.
My friend VG remarked in jest that Hyderabad wants to stay just the way it is, any attempts to modernize and transform it on the lines of Singapore will quickly see its political executive getting voted out of power. So he reasons, Hyderabad should have dirty pavements, potholed roads, chaotic mismanaged traffic and people relieving everywhere making it both an eye-sore and an olfactory challenge.
To my great disappointment, over the next few days I was to learn that is no such thing as pretty girls in Hyderabad either!!
My friend and his family were extremely hospitable. That in part offset my disappointment with the city.
If I had bothered to visit the Golkonda fort in my two previous visits, I would have got two extra marks in this year’s civil services mains!! (Golkonda Fort was one of the two-marker questions in the 2008 Civil Services Mains General Studies paper)
But during my earlier visits in 2003 and 2005, I was not an Aspirant and could care less about and old dilapidated fort. !!
On this visit however, the Golkonda fort was a priority. Forts, palaces, museums, tombs and the like fascinate me these days. I visualize myself living in the days when the forts and palaces were in their full functioning glory and imagining myself as the Sultan/Diwan/Nizam/Maharaja/Shehanshah gives me a weird vicarious sense of adventure and excitement.
The hour long sound and light show at the Golkonda fort was a bit too long for the lay visitor. In the first twenty minutes, people sat dazzled and enthralled by the multiple colours lighting up various parts of the towering fort as the booming voice of Amitabh Bachchan narrated the glory of the Qutub Shahis, their campaigns, conquests, romances and love life. The last twenty minutes were characterized by restless murmurs and catcalls as people's attention spans were breached by then. The golden rule always holds: keep it sweet and simple. The layman is just not interested in such intricate and tiring details complete with ghazals!
Arguably, the most neglected and ignored architectural symbols of any city, is the Charminar in Hyderabad. It serves more as a traffic island than as a respectable edifice erected to commemorate/celebrate any occurrence in history.
I was nevertheless thrilled and excited just being there. I could do without the maddening crowds, bumper to bumper traffic and blaring horns around me though. A visit to any place is not complete without a photo-op near its symbolic architectural structure, however unpleasant being physically present there actually gets.
One cannot do justice to the artifacts on display at the Salar Jung museum in a day, me thinks an enthusiast could take up to a week to fully appreciate the same. It’s a mind boggling collection and it’s bewildering to think that these are just the private collections of the Nawabs of Hyderabad. I can’t even imagine the fabulous wealth they must have enjoyed. As on my previous visit to the museum I had to rush through the last several display sections due to paucity of time.
Jowar, ragi, millets etc were various kinds of cereals that one became aware of as part of geography during school days. One had not seen these it or tasted it.
So I was pleasantly surprised to be offered jowar roti. So that was a first time.
I can’t possibly do enough justice to the brilliant culinary skills of my friend VG. I wonder why he chose to pursue engineering and management degrees. He is simply such an outstanding and marvelous cook and could easily have made his millions in Hyd as a celebrated chef considering the culinary traditions of the city.
A week passed by and before I realized it, it was time to head back to Bangalore.
Now the return tickets weren’t just available during the holiday season straddled between Christmas and New-year. Hence I booked two e-tickets, both of Waiting-List status hoping at least one would come through. Hours before the departure from Kacheguda, the WL status to my great relief gets converted to RAC.
Getting to Kacheguda railway station is a serious pain because of its distance from Hyderabad city. I did experience this pain during both my previous visits, but still thoughtlessly booked the train from Kacheguda yet again.
The train left KCG on time at 2115 and from 2130 to 2300 hrs I was engaged in a conversation with the young lady who sat facing me at the side lower berth. I think we talked a little too loud and a little too excitedly to win the disapproving looks of the conservative young couple and their noisy children who wanted either of us to shift to one of their confirmed berths situated somewhere randomly in the train. I wonder how they actually expected any of us to budge when we both were visibly having such a good time. Before we retired for the night she gave me a verbal assurance that she would apply for the civil services exam as soon as she reached home.
The Indian Railways is evidently not used to getting thank you mails.
I had e-mailed them regarding the cancellation of my other e-ticket. The online cancellation request was accepted but it took a while for them to credit my refund. Once the refund was received I sent them a thank you email, to which they replied that they had already refunded me and attached the details of the transaction and asked me to cross check with the bank once again! Some of the ways with the govt. organisations never change!!
But then in the current instance, I get invited to Hyderabad and I’m required to travel at very short notice, which meant absolutely no time was to be lost in making a decision.
A quick check on the railways site indicated the possibility of an RAC ticket. This also meant that it could soon become a Waiting List ticket if I did not act promptly.There was a serious risk that the time lost in reaching the railway station and joining the serpentine queue could almost deny me a chance to travel.
This is the context in which I sign up once again on the IRCTC website. My previous sign up had become invalid because my very valuable yahoo email-id had long been lost to phishers :(
It just felt so very nice, to get a ticket like that, clicking away at a few links, not needing to step out of home queuing up and sweating it out. And soon I was out getting a print of the ticket and there, I’m all ready to head to Hyderabad.
They have now introduced a Side Middle Berth between the traditional Side Upper Berth and the Side Lower Berths which neatly adds nine extra berths to a sleeper coach up from seventy two earlier to eighty one now. An ingenuous use of space for capacity utilisation!! I was much impressed.
On paper, both Hyderabad and Bangalore are comparable cities. Both are rapidly growing Indian metropolises, IT capitals, state capitals and south Indian cities with comparable size of populations. The similarity ends right there...
Bangalore is infinitely more cosmopolitan and in a sense more elitist. Hyderabad perfectly fits the description of a large overgrown Indian village. Unruly traffic, bad roads, people relieving themselves on the road in unacceptably large numbers.
My friend VG remarked in jest that Hyderabad wants to stay just the way it is, any attempts to modernize and transform it on the lines of Singapore will quickly see its political executive getting voted out of power. So he reasons, Hyderabad should have dirty pavements, potholed roads, chaotic mismanaged traffic and people relieving everywhere making it both an eye-sore and an olfactory challenge.
To my great disappointment, over the next few days I was to learn that is no such thing as pretty girls in Hyderabad either!!
My friend and his family were extremely hospitable. That in part offset my disappointment with the city.
If I had bothered to visit the Golkonda fort in my two previous visits, I would have got two extra marks in this year’s civil services mains!! (Golkonda Fort was one of the two-marker questions in the 2008 Civil Services Mains General Studies paper)
But during my earlier visits in 2003 and 2005, I was not an Aspirant and could care less about and old dilapidated fort. !!
On this visit however, the Golkonda fort was a priority. Forts, palaces, museums, tombs and the like fascinate me these days. I visualize myself living in the days when the forts and palaces were in their full functioning glory and imagining myself as the Sultan/Diwan/Nizam/Maharaja/Shehanshah gives me a weird vicarious sense of adventure and excitement.
The hour long sound and light show at the Golkonda fort was a bit too long for the lay visitor. In the first twenty minutes, people sat dazzled and enthralled by the multiple colours lighting up various parts of the towering fort as the booming voice of Amitabh Bachchan narrated the glory of the Qutub Shahis, their campaigns, conquests, romances and love life. The last twenty minutes were characterized by restless murmurs and catcalls as people's attention spans were breached by then. The golden rule always holds: keep it sweet and simple. The layman is just not interested in such intricate and tiring details complete with ghazals!
Arguably, the most neglected and ignored architectural symbols of any city, is the Charminar in Hyderabad. It serves more as a traffic island than as a respectable edifice erected to commemorate/celebrate any occurrence in history.
I was nevertheless thrilled and excited just being there. I could do without the maddening crowds, bumper to bumper traffic and blaring horns around me though. A visit to any place is not complete without a photo-op near its symbolic architectural structure, however unpleasant being physically present there actually gets.
One cannot do justice to the artifacts on display at the Salar Jung museum in a day, me thinks an enthusiast could take up to a week to fully appreciate the same. It’s a mind boggling collection and it’s bewildering to think that these are just the private collections of the Nawabs of Hyderabad. I can’t even imagine the fabulous wealth they must have enjoyed. As on my previous visit to the museum I had to rush through the last several display sections due to paucity of time.
Jowar, ragi, millets etc were various kinds of cereals that one became aware of as part of geography during school days. One had not seen these it or tasted it.
So I was pleasantly surprised to be offered jowar roti. So that was a first time.
I can’t possibly do enough justice to the brilliant culinary skills of my friend VG. I wonder why he chose to pursue engineering and management degrees. He is simply such an outstanding and marvelous cook and could easily have made his millions in Hyd as a celebrated chef considering the culinary traditions of the city.
A week passed by and before I realized it, it was time to head back to Bangalore.
Now the return tickets weren’t just available during the holiday season straddled between Christmas and New-year. Hence I booked two e-tickets, both of Waiting-List status hoping at least one would come through. Hours before the departure from Kacheguda, the WL status to my great relief gets converted to RAC.
Getting to Kacheguda railway station is a serious pain because of its distance from Hyderabad city. I did experience this pain during both my previous visits, but still thoughtlessly booked the train from Kacheguda yet again.
The train left KCG on time at 2115 and from 2130 to 2300 hrs I was engaged in a conversation with the young lady who sat facing me at the side lower berth. I think we talked a little too loud and a little too excitedly to win the disapproving looks of the conservative young couple and their noisy children who wanted either of us to shift to one of their confirmed berths situated somewhere randomly in the train. I wonder how they actually expected any of us to budge when we both were visibly having such a good time. Before we retired for the night she gave me a verbal assurance that she would apply for the civil services exam as soon as she reached home.
The Indian Railways is evidently not used to getting thank you mails.
I had e-mailed them regarding the cancellation of my other e-ticket. The online cancellation request was accepted but it took a while for them to credit my refund. Once the refund was received I sent them a thank you email, to which they replied that they had already refunded me and attached the details of the transaction and asked me to cross check with the bank once again! Some of the ways with the govt. organisations never change!!
Monday, December 8, 2008
Time to work again?
Back in Bangalore after a 20 day stint in Kannur, and I realise yet again that for some strange reason it is extremely difficult to do any serious study when I’m home! I believe this is true for most people; which is probably why a large chunk of people head to Delhi for civil services preparations year after year. More than the quality of coaching it is the ‘away from home factor’ and the complete freedom and ‘me- time’ that it gives which helps a great deal. A six month period of quiet contemplation and strategic planning (devoid of poky neighbours, well wishers and anxious parents worrying about their qualified and ‘unemployed’ neighbour/friend/daughter/son) should indeed help.
In these tumultuous times of worldwide financial misery, finding a job is not exactly an easy proposition. More importantly should I be working again so soon? Should I not be preparing for the interview? I jolly well know how it is going to be once I start working. 11 hours in the office and 3 hours on the road commuting! That would leave me hardly anytime to read the daily newspapers, forget doing any other serious reading with the interview in mind. Therefore, choosing to work in these few weeks has the risk of being under-prepared if and when the interview call comes.
So how about a part time job? Hmm…that indeed is worth considering :-)
In these tumultuous times of worldwide financial misery, finding a job is not exactly an easy proposition. More importantly should I be working again so soon? Should I not be preparing for the interview? I jolly well know how it is going to be once I start working. 11 hours in the office and 3 hours on the road commuting! That would leave me hardly anytime to read the daily newspapers, forget doing any other serious reading with the interview in mind. Therefore, choosing to work in these few weeks has the risk of being under-prepared if and when the interview call comes.
So how about a part time job? Hmm…that indeed is worth considering :-)
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Post Mains Reflections
Two weeks after the exams it does not feel like it was a strenuous week at all.
Appearing for nine 3-hour long exams in a span of six days had seemed tiring, exhausting and grossly unfair. Just two weeks later it all seems to have been fair and just!
Probably explains why nobody talks about altering the scheme of exams when asked about it later in the interview!! (More often than not the last question asked to interviewees is whether they had any suggestions to make to alter/improve the scheme of the examination). By the time the interview takes place the mains exam would be too distant an occurrence in the past to even remotely feel like a bothersome experience.
There is a complete feeling of ennui these days and coupled with the fact that I’m not even reading the newspapers with any regularity, I have now got too much time on my hands...he he. Oh But yes I need to read about Budhism, the Mauryans and the Guptas… the topics that kind of interested me when I was going through those phases of Indian history earlier. (My fascination for the Mughals continues)
I have to confront the question of starting to work again pretty soon.
I really can’t be sure of an interview call. Actually no body ever can be. But just about everyone who writes the mains is mildly expectant unless otherwise it turned to be an outright disaster :-)
I did not do the papers too badly, probably did it significantly better than my 2006 attempt. But one can never tell with these subjective papers. A great deal depends on who corrects the papers as well.
The Public Administration paper for one was way too general ...just about anybody could have written it ...and way too unpredictable...I like the unpredictably part of the UPSC question papers ...takes the wind out of the sail of the dedicated Delhi based coaching institutes ...he he
UPSC is always mindful of the fact that exam has to be made unfair to everyone, which makes it fair to everyone in a weird sense ...like it is said ...’Life isn’t fair, but it is unfair to everyone, that makes it fair’!!
Appearing for nine 3-hour long exams in a span of six days had seemed tiring, exhausting and grossly unfair. Just two weeks later it all seems to have been fair and just!
Probably explains why nobody talks about altering the scheme of exams when asked about it later in the interview!! (More often than not the last question asked to interviewees is whether they had any suggestions to make to alter/improve the scheme of the examination). By the time the interview takes place the mains exam would be too distant an occurrence in the past to even remotely feel like a bothersome experience.
There is a complete feeling of ennui these days and coupled with the fact that I’m not even reading the newspapers with any regularity, I have now got too much time on my hands...he he. Oh But yes I need to read about Budhism, the Mauryans and the Guptas… the topics that kind of interested me when I was going through those phases of Indian history earlier. (My fascination for the Mughals continues)
I have to confront the question of starting to work again pretty soon.
I really can’t be sure of an interview call. Actually no body ever can be. But just about everyone who writes the mains is mildly expectant unless otherwise it turned to be an outright disaster :-)
I did not do the papers too badly, probably did it significantly better than my 2006 attempt. But one can never tell with these subjective papers. A great deal depends on who corrects the papers as well.
The Public Administration paper for one was way too general ...just about anybody could have written it ...and way too unpredictable...I like the unpredictably part of the UPSC question papers ...takes the wind out of the sail of the dedicated Delhi based coaching institutes ...he he
UPSC is always mindful of the fact that exam has to be made unfair to everyone, which makes it fair to everyone in a weird sense ...like it is said ...’Life isn’t fair, but it is unfair to everyone, that makes it fair’!!
Friday, May 23, 2008
A-Person- like- me moment
‘A Person like me’.
This is one of the key responses that Market Researchers look for in questionnaires administered to a test group in a Pre-ad test.
Pre ad tests are conducted by Advertising/Market Research companies to assess/pre-determine the effectiveness, usefulness & impact among other things of a certain newly created ad.
To do all of the above, the ad in question is shown to the test group masked as a clutter. A good example of a clutter that can be used to test the effectiveness of say, a Pril dish wash bar would be the following bunch of TV ads in random order:
Santoor sandalwood soap
Pond’s cold cream
Lakme nail polish
Pril dish wash bar
Wheel detergent powder
The target group is led to believe that the exercise is aimed at conducting TV/media studies to avoid prejudicing/biasing its responses.
Once the respondent has seen the clutter, she is taken through a questionnaire.
Among the scores of multiple choice questions, appears the one below
The said product would normally be used by ______________ (Tick all that apply)
- Working women
- Upper Class Women
- Educated Women
- Women like me
- Housewives
- Teenagers
- Fashionable women
- Middle class women
The researcher only cares if the response ‘Women like me’ is ticked; the other responses are dummy ones really.
If an ad is able to evoke/evince a response from a respondent to the effect that the advertised product or service is relevant/useful/used/essential to/by/for ‘people like me’, that means a great lot to the advertiser!
Phew, that has been a long introduction ….
So why exactly am I talking about Market Research here?
I had a person-like-me moment last week when the results of the civil service exams 2007 were announced. A friend who secured All India Rank 14 caused this.
This does two things to me:
Sunday, January 27, 2008
a post long overdue
This post is long overdue.
and its my third attempt at blogging.can't even remember where i had my last two accounts !
Considering how hardworking and systematic and punctual i am...the longevity of this blog really cant guaranteed beyond this post ;-)
And now the big dilemma is how truthful should i be in here. should i just speak my mind and put my deepest fears/anxieties/thoughts/fantasies/pleasures/joys in here without a care and treat it as a personal journal/diary meant only for my nostalgic requirements later in life or should i strive to have an audience for these posts. should i attempt to make it humorous ...should i write controversial stuff in here and post comments in other people's blogs so that they would in turn read these lines and comment ?! ;-) ... i guess i will learn on the job :-)
I already regret not doing this sooner because i feel i have missed out 'recording' some stages of my life which i would have cherished a great deal reading about, later in life .
Once one falls into a certain rhythm of life , i guess there wouldn't be much to write about for the simple reason that the average day would become very predictable and unexciting even if one were working for the NASA / an investment bank /an IT firm or an engineering MNC.
One would in fact attempt to login to blogger.com daily, only if there are exciting things happening every single day, which probably explains the great deal of travel blogs out there.
its the new experiences that get us excited, that we want to write about , and want to share with the world.
I foresee a lot of turbulence and excitement looking into the next few years of my life. so i guess i'm timing this really well :-)
and its my third attempt at blogging.can't even remember where i had my last two accounts !
Considering how hardworking and systematic and punctual i am...the longevity of this blog really cant guaranteed beyond this post ;-)
And now the big dilemma is how truthful should i be in here. should i just speak my mind and put my deepest fears/anxieties/thoughts/fantasies/pleasures/joys in here without a care and treat it as a personal journal/diary meant only for my nostalgic requirements later in life or should i strive to have an audience for these posts. should i attempt to make it humorous ...should i write controversial stuff in here and post comments in other people's blogs so that they would in turn read these lines and comment ?! ;-) ... i guess i will learn on the job :-)
I already regret not doing this sooner because i feel i have missed out 'recording' some stages of my life which i would have cherished a great deal reading about, later in life .
Once one falls into a certain rhythm of life , i guess there wouldn't be much to write about for the simple reason that the average day would become very predictable and unexciting even if one were working for the NASA / an investment bank /an IT firm or an engineering MNC.
One would in fact attempt to login to blogger.com daily, only if there are exciting things happening every single day, which probably explains the great deal of travel blogs out there.
its the new experiences that get us excited, that we want to write about , and want to share with the world.
I foresee a lot of turbulence and excitement looking into the next few years of my life. so i guess i'm timing this really well :-)
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